- h.p. (via ixvixiii)
- (via lovefordachshunds)
I. There will be a time when he leaves, a time where he breaks your heart. When he walks out the door he will take a piece of you with him, a piece you think you will never get back. Your heart will drop to the floor and shatter, just as the syllables of your name when he says it for the last time. The taste in your mouth will be a mix of tears, and blood from biting your tongue too hard and trying to act like you’re fine. When all you really wanted to do was scream and beg him to stay.
II. You will watch him leave and it will feel like his hands are clenched around your throat. Maybe that’s why you can’t breathe, because he still has a hold on you. That night you won’t get any sleep, and you’ll stare at the phone waiting for a text, call, something. You’re waiting for something that will never come, close your tired eyes, go to sleep.
III. In the morning you’ll wake up, and it will hit you like a thousand pound brick has been thrown at your chest, he’s not yours. The first day is the hardest, realizing how lonely you actually are, you can’t even remember what you did before him. So you will drown yourself in your tears, topped with sad music, empty memories, and thoughts of dying. You just don’t know yet, darling, that it’s not the end of the world.
IV. It’s been a week since he left, you haven’t touched your makeup bag, you haven’t even done anything to your hair besides pull it up. I mean, there’s no point anymore right? Your mama tells you it’s his loss, but you scowl at her and run into your room. You need to be alone, you want to be alone, you are alone.
V. A month and three days, you’ve counted all the minutes without him. You feel so pathetic as you turn on that song you’ve been listening to over and over again, because it’s the only thing that gets how you feel. You’ll search his name on facebook, and he’s the first result to come up after only typing one letter. You see his smiling face in pictures, you will almost hear the excitement in his voice, like how he was when he talked to you. You’ll be on the verge of another breakdown, so you close the laptop and fling your head into the pillow. You’ll be okay.
VI. One day you’ll find yourself sitting in a coffee shop, at the library, at the lunch table, laying on your bedroom floor. His name will come across your mind, and for a moment it will kill like a bullet in the back. It will be a bitter taste in your mouth, and burn your throat all the way down as you try to swallow it back. You’ll wonder how he’s doing, you’ll wonder where he is, a tear will run down your cheek. You wipe it away and try to smile, at least he loved you for a little while.
VII. There will come a time, maybe six months from now, a year, two years, where someone can bring him up in a conversation and you won’t flinch any longer. Because you know, this heartbreak made you stronger."
- i.c. // “It’s not fucking fair that I am unhappy and he’s perfectly okay.”
- (Talking to you makes me happy)
- M.S. (via coffee-crinkled-pages)
1. The way my laugh sounds still
drowned in sleep when you tell
me I look cute with morning hair.
2. How gentle my voice is when
I kiss you and say the world feels
like it’s all candlelit when we’re
3. My hand in your hand, my
hand on your thigh, my hand
in your hair, my hand on your
4. The way I become a castle
for you; how I boldly hold your
secrets, how I gently hold your
worry and your sadness, how I
carefully hold you.
- anne, things you’ll never know if you only want me for the chase
From the first fleeting glances
exchanged over the shoulders
to the shy hellos
uttered with butterflies in the stomach,
I liked you.
From the first slight pecks
induced by stuttering lips
to the passionate amore
shared by a pair of intimate mouths,
I wanted you.
From the first warm hug
exchanged during one cool summer day
to the fervent embrace
performed with heartbeats beating as one,
I loved you.
- "would you write a poem for me about the beginning of a relationship; first kisses, cuddles, heartbeats" (NJ.)